In February I watched "Thank You for Smoking" which I thought was a shitty movie but the motif about putting pictures on the packs of cigarettes really stuck with me because they actually do that here. Every pack of cigarettes sold in Brazil comes with a pretty frightening image of dying children or lung disease on the back; this of course doesn't stop people from smoking like chimneys all over Rio. One of my first big HUH? moments when I got here was 1) how god awful hot-humid it was in summer and 2) how do people smoke in this heat?My lungs, along with other arteries of my body took a beating during the bagunçada loucura of Carnaval, especially on the days Bruno and Dylan invited us to tag along with their entourage. I remember Bruno leaving and coming back with some cigarettes telling us it was a sign of bad luck because he had gotten stuck with the IMPOTÊNCIA picture. The impotence photo is something I had been trying to bring up on this page for awhile, but the thought of googling 'brazilian impotence picture' seemed to only promise ugly image results so I desisted. Luckily I came across this gem though the other day on the street and I saved it, planning to photobooth myself with it and share my two cents with you.
So yeah, this picture is great. The huge thumbs down over the dick of that well-toned dude making a 'pô?!' (what?!) gesture gets me every time. So many cultural things to comment on there. Even the hand of the girl giving the thumbs down is well-manicured, correctly demonstrating the beauty standards for middle-class and above brazilian women. Girls in Rio (and a lot of Brazil, so I hear) are expected to have painted fingers and toes, shiny hair, waxed vaginas and nice outfits complete with expensive purses and sunglasses on a daily basis. (I on the other hand, have owned the jacket in seen photograph since 7th grade and the shirt since my high school graduation). Plastic surgery is not a taboo here, in fact it's fairly common to get nose jobs and boob enhancement and discuss it at leisure. Most newsstands have a few copies of a magazine called "Plastic Sexy" and my favorite, "Dieta, já! (diet now!). I know that the USA isn't perfect, and that women have their fair share of expectations from society to be skinny and sexy all the time, but at least someone sometime in our youth told us "you are beautiful the way you are" or "it's what's inside that counts". That probably has to do with the fact that Oprah, an undeniably fat woman told us so and paid Dove to make commercials sharing the dangers of eating disorders. I remember seeing a special on Oprah interviewing women from around the world and the Brazilian of the program said the average Brazilian woman spends over half her income on her appearance. Seeing the hundred or so women I see everyday, I don't doubt that statistic for a second. Originally it made me feel pressured to run to a salon but whenever I got close to one I'd run away screaming and spend my money on açaí at BB Lanches with Krystal.
Rio de Janeiro demands a lot of its ladies but it also has some high expectations of its men. Carioca boys are hot, period. They work out, wear nice expensive clothes and tan on the beach in speedos in packs of four or more. Beaches here are separated every kilometer by numbered lifeguard posts and Post 9 of Ipanema is where the hottest people in town like to congregate. Nearby is the rainbow flag-decorated posto 8, the gay section where even hotter dudes go to meet the hottest gay cariocas in town. During my confused first few weeks here I went to post 9 because that's where all the other exchange students had read in our matching Brazil guidebooks was the place to be--and I think my self-esteem never recovered. I was so intimidated with the glamor of these people but then quickly learned to hate it because all that body image preoccupation creates some pretty obnoxious and superficial people.
There are exceptions to every stereotype of course, I've met some cool carioca boys and girls but let's say as a general rule, people here are crazy. No wonder the guy on the cigarette box is pissed his girlfriend is dissing him, he is at least hitting the gym three times a week to impress his girlfriend, let him relax a second e fumar uma! Did I forget to mention a gym membership in Zona Sul will set you back between 150 and 300 reais a month? Keep in mind minimum wage is only 500 reais a month. I don't know how these people support this lifestyle, but I do understand their tendency to live with their parents for much longer than any one I know from the states would be able to stand. If I were them I'd save the money they spend on puffing smoke and invest in an apartment of my own. At least then I wouldn't have to have sex in a motel just to get some privacy. Motels are everywhere, also a Brazil "0k". Haha I already miss this crazy place.
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!!!!! this is a good one
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